Ukraine to use Marc Lowe CD-Rs as a defense against invading Russian military forces. It is hoped that the ear damaging cacophony of Marc Lowe noise will make the Russians retreat and leave Ukraine alone. As a preventive measure, all Ukrainian citizens will be issued ear plugs to ensure they do not suffer the same punishment administered to the Ruskies. The leaders of Ukraine have instructed citizens on how to play the CD-Rs, which will be donated by NATO and the New Jersey Institute of Narcissistic Genius Musicans Who Can't Play Anything in the next few hours. Ukraine is also toying with the idea of dropping boomboxes streaming Marc Lowe music on Spotify on Moscow to terrorize the Russian politicians responsible for their aggression on what was a peaceful Marc Lowe Music Free Zone in Eastern Europe.
2021年8月18日水曜日
Pitiful fake musician purchases Spotify listeners for his ego
What does a fake musician with no fans do?
Why he buys himself listeners on Spotify, of course.
Ooh! And, while he's at it, he buys YouTube views, as well.
I wonder if Led Zeppelin used to buy thousands of their own records...
Probably not. But, then again, they were talented and not shameless narcissists.
2020年10月2日金曜日
Greatest President & First Lady Ever Fall Victim To Evil MARCOVID23 VIRUS
It is with a heavy heart that The Uri Tenpo Movement must report that The Greatest President Ever & The Greatest First Lady Ever have fallen victim to the evil Marcovid23 Virus. Top officials at the Mayonnaise Clinic in the great Republican State of Minisoda explained POTUS and FLOTUS contracted the terrible Marcovid23 virus when an exuberant supporter at a MAGA Trump Rally mistakenly selected a Marc Lowe song on Spotify when he had meant to choose a well-written and patriotic Sousa number.
Musical analysts expressed that because every Marc Lowe song is poorly written, horribly performed and sung out of tune, that they all transmit the Marcovid23 Virus and people of all ages are at risk of contracting this unique bad music virus via Bluetooth, Blueballs, 4G, 5G, G-Shock, G-Spot, Wi-Fi, Hi-Fi, Marc-Lowe-Fi, YouTube, Spotify, Videomotion, Bandcamp, and even official Dark Shroud Records (which are probably really recorded in a rented apartment and just CD-Rs burned on an English teacher's computer).
The public is advised to not attend events where Marc Lowe music will be performed or perhaps mistakenly played over speakers of any size. Furthermore, The Uri Tenpo Movement wish Donald and Melania speedy recoveries and, hopefully, no PTSD from the horrible experience they suffered by being exposed to bad music.